She’s BACK!! (guest post!)

She is BACK! The lovely girl from Girlie Says What, the fantastic lass who composed my last Guest Blog Post is here once AGAIN! So, please kick back and enjoy the pleasant ramblings of a dear friend…

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Oh my oh my oh my! Dear FRIEND, how I have missed you! Hey, don’t you run away from me — you come back here, lad, I do know your mother, you realize! Yes, come on. There we go. You didn’t call me for tea and scones like we discussed in the last guest blog post! What gives? It’s my hair, isn’t it? Just because you don’t dig brunettes means you suddenly can’t be open to them? Nice. Way to be close-minded.

Anywho, young citizens of America, Guam, and Hogwarts, it’s good to see ya again! Thank you for this lovely welcome party. Who organized this? Don’t be shy! Oh, I think I see a hand in the back, you, in the grey shirt. I give you my thanks, Grey Shirt. This guacamole is really quite superb. Was that your doing again, Grey Shirt? And how about these fancy decorations? The streamers seem to twinkle much like the glistening stars above!

Speaking of guacamole, I had some yesterday! It was whipped up in the kitchen of Mrs. Sam the III. Just kidding, she isn’t married (YET). But seriously, it was gnarly. By the way, in case you forgot who I am, my name is Maddie, but you can call me Maddie (or, just call me — ha!). So I slept over at Sam’s homestead last night, and I was out like a light, I say! I totally collapsed at 11. It’s currently 9:15 a.m., and we are just chilling on her bed. She’s talking about toe cramps. So for all you gentlemen out there, this girl likes long walks on the beach, a good bowl of guacamole, and toe cramps.

SPEAKING of suitors, I’m free on the 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, and I suppose I could fit you in between lunch and yoga on the 25. But hey, no pressure. If you can’t fit me in this month, why don’t we just hang out next month? I am free on the 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10…I could go on, but I don’t want to overwhelm you with options.

My stomach is roaring like a mighty jaguar. I am very, very hungry. But in a way, it’s very funny to listen to it pound like a stampede of killer man-eating buffalo. Sam’s tummy is earthquaking too. NO, stupid spellcheck, earthquaking is a word, DON’T DOUBT ME. Gosh. So we are listening to the guitarist from the Strokes sing and play on Sam’s iHome. He just said a naughty word!! Thou art wash out thy’s mouth with soap, Mr. I-am-going-to-be-cool-and-cuss-to-try-and-attract-girls!

I guess I will say farewell and turn you back over to Samantha. I expect a call from you. Or a fax, maybe. E-mail works, too. I can also text, Instant Message, and a good old hand-written letter is always enjoyable. Ciao!

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